What does that mean know me, know me, nobody ever knows anybody else, ever! You will never know me.
– The Rules of Attraction, Bret Easton Ellis (via fuckyeahliteraryquotes) Via fuck yeah, literary quotesI am not a person and I am not an animal. There is something I am here for something I must do before I can go.
– The Wild Boys: A Book of the Dead, William S. Burroughs (via fuckyeahliteraryquotes) Via fuck yeah, literary quotes“You do know that anytime you decide you want to be different you can just start, right?” - JM
The truth? One of my greatest fears is being weak. I have struggled in even mustering up enough courage to simply bare my heart on the pages of this blog. I run away from the face of vulnerability; the only emotions I ever allow see the light of day are those that are surface deep - the others have been suffocated and inhibited so much that I hardly acknowledge their existence anymore. I’m OK with this. My skin is tough, my backbone unbreakable, my pride never faltering.
This hasn’t, by any means, always been the case. I have been introduced to my breaking point on multiple occasions. After that last dreadful introduction, though, I realized the edge doesn’t always have the best view and misery is not the company I wish to keep.
The secret? We are prisoners of our own minds but we have the sole choice if we want to live out our imprisonment as a victim. If you tell yourself you can’t, you won’t. If you tell yourself that it is OK, it will be. There is no greater power than that of choice and freewill: the two ingredients of dictating your own life.
I have been so mentally weak that scraping myself off my bedroom floor took hours and many futile attempts. I have been so emotionally drained that crawling out of bed was more exercise than my body cared to endure. I have been there. But after I picked myself up and after, pardon the expression, brushed myself off, I realized it was easier to just be happy. It was effortless; you do the things you love, surround yourself with the people that love you, and the exasperating breakdown becomes the invigorating breakthrough.
I have allowed my mind to get clouded in a haze of negativity; I have allowed my back to be burdened with the substantial weight I carry. I have allowed myself to see the future in an unclear light, my present in shambles. Stop. Just stop. The obstacles we face smirk at us and greet us in their sarcastic manner - they say, “you won’t make it.” The truth? I have been through worst, I will go through worst, but I will get through all of it - because that is the decision I have chosen to make.
About me
The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.
